


All That Matters

by fangirlsanity



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Baekhyun is a good friend, Breaking Up & Making Up, Drummer Chanyeol, I just wanted to write, M/M, Model Sehun, Wrote this because I couldn't sleep so it's not great
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 02:02:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16986021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirlsanity/pseuds/fangirlsanity
Summary: But you’re a path the longer that I travelThe more I’m just defeatedMy past mistakes repeatedI’ll risk it once again to have you near my sideAnother chance to let you just destroy my pride—"All That Matters", Jeff Williams (feat. Casey Lee Williams)Chanyeol can't seem to move on. Turns out Sehun can't either.





	All That Matters

**Author's Note:**

> Chanhun was the first member x member ship in EXO that I fell into and I can't get out. There aren't enough fics on here and it makes me sad. I hope my contribution to this tag is a good one.

 

It started with an article.

* * *

 

**MODEL OH SEHUN ON REGRETS AND RETURNING TO KOREA**

After runway shows, magazine covers, and appearances abroad, famous model Oh Sehun has suddenly made the decision to come back home to Korea. This announcement was made after his appearance in Paris Fashion Week. Here is our exclusive interview with him.

Sehun: I really enjoyed doing my own thing abroad. But recently I had this revelation that I had unfinished business back home. I didn’t feel right about continuing my career without resolving that first.

Interviewer: Are you planning on taking a hiatus while you’re here?

Sehun: To be honest, I didn’t intend for this news to become as big as it did (laughs). I’ll be doing some things here and there but I won’t have as packed of a schedule as usual.

Interviewer: It’s good that you’re still going to be modeling, I think the world would riot if they didn’t see you for a while (laughs). When you resolved this business, will you be returning overseas?

* * *

 

Chanyeol closed the tab, not wanting to continue.

 

Sehun always had a way to make Chanyeol’s heart beat faster even when he wasn’t there.

 

As if sensing his thoughts, his phone started to ring. He groaned upon seeing Baekhyun’s name on the caller id. He answered anyways, knowing that he wouldn’t hear the end of it if he didn’t.

 

“Yeollie,” the ever bright voice of his best friend had begun, “did you see—”

 

“Yes, I saw,” Chanyeol snapped.

 

He could hear Baekhyun pout on the other line. “How do you feel about Sehun being back? Are you okay?”

 

Chanyeol sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know how to feel, to be honest. I just hope that he finishes up what he needs to do quickly before I see him.”

 

Baekhyun remained silent on his end, and Chanyeol knew that a silent Baekhyun wasn’t a good Baekhyun.

 

“What?” he whined. “I can hear you thinking.”

 

“I’m just dumbfounded at how dense you’re being right now,” he deadpanned.

 

Chanyeol pouted. “What do you mean?”

 

“Chanyeollie, you know that his unfinished business is you, right?” Baekhyun said softly.

 

Chanyeol scoffed. “Can’t be.”

 

“Is that so hard to believe?”

 

Chanyeol’s mind flashed back to the last time he saw Sehun. The tears. The accusations. The way that Sehun looked at him when he said that they were done and they couldn’t hold each other back. The lingering emptiness that Chanyeol still can’t quite fill.

 

“Things between us are final,” he said bluntly. “No unfinished business here.”

 

Baekhyun sighed. “If that’s what you say. But I know you still have a Google Alert for his name. No one even uses Google Alerts. So I don’t think either of you is done with each other.”

 

“Aren’t you my best friend? Shouldn’t you be encouraging me to move on?”

 

“I am your best friend. And I know that you two are happier together than apart.”

 

Chanyeol closed his eyes, not wanting to acknowledge what Baekhyun was saying. He didn’t want to get his hopes up for a meeting that might not happen.

 

“I guess we’ll see,” he sighed. “I’ll see you later, okay?”

 

He hung up before Baekhyun could say anything back, placing the phone on the bed. He grabbed his guitar from its stand and started to strum. Playing music was always a double-edged sword since Sehun left. He would play to distract himself from painful memories while conjuring up memories of how Sehun would light up every time he sang to him. Yet, playing his guitar gave him a sort of clarity that he didn’t have in real life. In music, he could forget about the painful memories that hurt him more still than he would like to admit.

 

He started to sing softly, a tune that he wrote when they were still together.

 

“Don’t you worry about the dark

I will light up the night with the love in my heart

I’ll burn like the sun, keep you safe and warm.”

 

* * *

 

 

Chanyeol could feel eyes on him as he performed.

 

Attention was something he was used to when he was onstage, jamming out on the drums with the rest of his band all around him, setting the tempo to Jongdae’s guitar riffs and Baekhyun’s vocals. He thrived off of attention, it spurred him to play harder. But tonight was different, it made Chanyeol’s skin crawl.

 

After the concert ended, he got his answer in the form of a Baekhyun with a shit-eating grin.

“What did you do?” he asked, exasperated.

 

“You’ll thank me later,” Baekhyun answered, grin not faltering. He stepped to the side and Chanyeol felt his eyes nearly burst out of their sockets.

 

There stood Sehun, even more handsome than he last saw him. He was dressed too formally for a rock concert, in slacks and a white button-up shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Chanyeol could feel his heart beat erratically as he took in the sight of his ex-boyfriend in front of him.

 

Shit. This was not good.

 

Sehun stepped closer to him, a shy smile on his face. Chanyeol felt angry suddenly. How could Sehun reappear in front of him as if nothing happened?

 

Chanyeol hastily grabbed his jacket from a chair and put it on.

 

“Where are you going?” Baekhyun asked, alarmed.

 

Chanyeol didn’t meet Baekhyun’s eyes and most definitely not Sehun’s as he escaped from the dressing room, ignoring the calls of his name.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“I want to tell you that I’m sorry,” Sehun said the next night. His eyes filled with determination. Chanyeol knew he was trapped under the gaze. He’s not sure how Sehun managed to find him in a random bar. Although Chanyeol suspected Baekhyun had something to do with it. He always had a soft spot for Sehun, even after everything. “I’m sorry about how I left. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

 

Chanyeol sighed, downing the rest of his white Russian. “I forgave you a long time ago, Sehun.”

 

And it was true, Chanyeol had realized after he calmed down from his anger. The moment he saw his ex-boyfriend’s face grace the cover of magazines and on billboards, he was forgiven. After all, how could he stand in the way of Sehun’s dreams? The problem never lied with Sehun, it lied with him. His inability to move on.

 

“Then why won’t you look at me?”

 

Chanyeol looked and his heart almost burst out of his chest.

 

Sehun was breathtaking in his black leather jacket and ripped jeans. His hair was styled back and out of his face. He was dressed too good for a shitty bar like this one. Maybe moving on would be easier if Sehun were ugly.

 

Sehun smirked, looking sinful. “You’re ears are red. You’re flustered.”

 

Chanyeol instinctively covered his ears with his hands. “Am not.”

 

Sehun laughed. “You are.” They sat next to each other for a while, silent. The smile on Sehun’s face never fading. He sipped on a beer that he ordered.

 

Meanwhile, Chanyeol was at war with himself. He felt the need to run away, but at the same time, he craved to be in Sehun’s company.

 

“I’ve never seen you this quiet,” Sehun commented. “Is it me?”

 

Chanyeol shrugged, “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to act around you anymore.”

 

Sehun frowned, Chanyeol thought that it didn’t suit his face.

 

“Let’s start with this. Fill me in on the last two years of your life.”

 

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Chanyeol asked, confused. “You’re the one living in different countries.”

 

“Don’t you have a Google Alert on me?” he said, amused. “I assume you’ve kept up with how I was doing. Baekhyun-hyung told me about it after you ran away last night.”

 

Chanyeol felt his face burn with embarrassment, damn Baekhyun. “I only know what the articles tell me. Other than that I know nothing about you.”

 

Sehun frowned at his wording before quickly covering it up with a forced smile. “Then let’s do this. You give me something that I’ve missed the last few years and I’ll give something back. Then we can see where the night goes.”

 

He quirked an eyebrow at Chanyeol, tipping his beer at him. “You in?”

 

Chanyeol sighed and flagged the waiter down for a beer.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

It was almost too easy for it to fall to the familiarity of their dynamic. After the initial awkwardness, conversation flowed freely between them. Chanyeol had forgotten how easy it was to talk to each other. Soon enough they were both doubling over laughing over crazy stories and old memories.

 

It was like old times.

 

They stayed long after that first beer, until the bar got too crowded for intimate conversation. They walked back to Chanyeol’s place, conversation flowing freely between them. And Chanyeol could pretend that Sehun hadn’t left. He could pretend that this was a regular date, back in the early days of their relationship. They ended up at Chanyeol’s door and he was ready to leave the night as it was.

 

But there was still a question that burned in Chanyeol’s mind.

 

“What’s the unfinished business you were talking about in that interview? The reason why you came back?” Chanyeol blurted out before he could stop the words.

 

Sehun scoffed and grabbed Chanyeol by his jacket. “You’re so dense, hyung.”

 

He crashed their lips together in a heated kiss and Chanyeol’s mind went blank. Sehun was filling his senses. They fit together, moving in sync, and it was hard to tell that they were apart at all. Sehun still moaned when Chanyeol bit his bottom lip. Sehun felt up his chest, making Chanyeol shiver. He was falling deeper and deeper back into him. If he was drowning, he didn’t want to be saved.

 

But then Chanyeol’s eyes snapped open. His brain had caught up to his actions. He shoved Sehun away, leaving him confused in the middle of the empty hallway. He had to nip this in the bud before he got hurt again.

 

“We shouldn’t do this,” Chanyeol said, breathless. “I can’t do this.”

 

“Chanyeol-hyung,” Sehun pleaded, reaching out towards him. “Please—”

 

He stepped away out of Sehun’s reach, choosing to ignore the stricken look on the younger’s face. “I don’t know what you want from me, Sehun. I already told you that I forgive you for what happened in the past, but you’re still here and it’s messing with my brain.” He clenched his fists and took deep breaths, trying to not hyperventilate over the pressure. He chuckled darkly. “You know, there was a time where I begged you to stay. Now I want nothing else than for you to go.”

 

He looked back up at Sehun’s face to see tears streaming down his cheeks. If Chanyeol was a lesser person, he would have felt vindicated over making Sehun feel as shitty as he did. But instead, he just felt worse. He didn’t want to be the reason for Sehun’s tears.

 

“I came back for you,” Sehun said brokenly. He wiped away his tears on his sleeve. “Even though I was out in the world achieving my dreams, my world still felt so empty without you. I was stubborn, but I’m standing before you now and telling you that my success and fame wasn’t worth giving you up. That the runway shows and the photo shoots don’t compare to the feeling of love that I felt in your arms.”

 

He stared back in Chanyeol’s eyes. The love that he saw within them reminded him of what felt like a lifetime ago. And he knew that Sehun was being truthful.

 

“I know I broke both of our hearts by leaving,” Sehun admitted. “But I’m asking you to take a chance on me again. To believe in me that I’m not going to leave you. But if you can look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t want to give me that then you’ll never have to see me again.”

 

Chanyeol opened his mouth to deny, deny, deny as he has for the last two years. Deny Sehun the chance for reconciliation. Deny the feelings that he still held for the man in front of him. Deny himself the chance to open himself up for hurt again.

 

But he was so, so tired. He didn’t want to keep lying to himself. To Sehun. The traitorous feelings that he had inside overflowed through the cracks in his heart. Pressure built up and he found himself crying too.

 

“I never stopped loving you,” Chanyeol whispered, and for the first time since Sehun left he could let out the truth that he buried deep inside. “I can’t stop loving you.”

 

Sehun’s eyes lit up and he opened his mouth to reply but Chanyeol interrupted him.

 

“But I don’t—” he looked at Sehun desperately “—I don’t know how to let you in again. I’m scared I won’t remember how.”

 

Sehun smiled sadly and brought a hand to Chanyeol’s cheek. He sighed and leaned into the touch. “Let’s try to learn each other again, Chanyeol. Give me a chance. We can’t start over, but we can try to make up for lost time.”

 

Chanyeol closed his eyes and rested his forehead on Sehun’s. Sehun’s breath hitched in his throat at the contact.

 

“Ask me again,” Sehun said, his breath fanned over Chanyeol’s face. “Ask me to stay.”

 

Chanyeol moved ever closer, their noses brushing against each other. He gave in to the desires that he had craved ever since he saw Sehun again. “Sehun-ah, will you stay?”

 

“Yes,” Sehun breathed, before crashing his lips onto Chanyeol’s.

 

 

 

 

“I can’t either,” Sehun said, breaking the silence that had fallen between them. They were lying in Chanyeol’s bed now, exhausted after a bout of makeup sex. They were tangled in each other skin against skin.

 

Chanyeol hummed, opening one eye to look at Sehun curiously.

 

“I can’t stop loving you either,” Sehun admitted, running his hands through Chanyeol’s hair.

 

“We’re pretty dumb,” Chanyeol mumbled sleepily.

 

Sehun laughed softly before pressing their lips together in a chaste kiss. “We are. But at least we came back to each other.”


End file.
